Some Vikings for my Liking

Posted by The Bay Area Crew, June 11, 2018 07:20pm | Post a Comment

By Kai Wada Roath
Ambassador of Confusion Hill and host of the Super Shangri-La Show

The Vikings"Across the rainbow bridge of Asgard,
Where the booming heavens roar.
You'll behold in breathless wonder,
The God of Thunder, Mighty Thor!"
~ The Mighty Thor theme from the 1966 cartoon

When I was a kid of just 10 years old, I would ride my Huffy down to the docks with my crab net on my back and spend the day hauling up rock crabs to later throw in a boiling cauldron before having a feast with my nutcracker. This is not the case for Tony Curtis in The Vikings (1958) in which he is sentenced to death by being tied in a low pool to be eaten alive by crabs.

In my humble opinion, this movie is the best Viking movie to this day. I mean, it's a no-brainer, Kirk Douglas has one eye and seeks revenge, and Ernest Borgnine is his dad, drinking out of a horn ...and it's narrated by Orson Welles!

If you live near Bagdad by the Bay, you can see The Vikings on the big screen at the historic Balboa Theatre in San Francisco this coming Wednesday, June 13th at 7:30pm and also buy it on DVD or Blu-ray at Amoeba and keep it in your Odin's Treasure Vault at home.

If your only exposure to Viking flicks is The 13th Warrior, the Vikings TV series, or Thor: Ragnarok (the director Taika Waititi is great; be sure to see his films What We Do in the Shadows and Boy.), then you need to go get a smoked turkey leg and a goblet of Wild Elderberry mead and watch some of these...

The Viking Queen is a 1967 Hammer film that...well, just watch the trailer. Do I really need I say more to entice your sleazy eyeballs? Is it historically accurate? Who cares! SEE the occult terrors of the Druids!

Viking WomenThis would be a nicely-paired double-feature with Roger Corman's The Saga of the Viking Women and Their Voyage to the Waters of the Great Sea Serpent (often shortened to just The Viking Women and the Sea Serpent).

Trying to quit smoking and you also wish you were teleported back in time to the Condor strip club in 1966? Try listening to "Nicotine" by The Vikings. This song is just one of the many cherished delights on the Las Vegas Grind Part 1 album, put out by Crypt Records. Buy the whole collection...Trust in me, just in me, shut your eyes and trust in me.

Anita EkbergThe 1960s-70s offered Viking-mania with many movies. The Long Ships (1964), Alfred the Great (1969), and The Norseman (1978), to name a few of the big ones. Cameron Mitchell, who acted in many sword and sandal films, starred in such Viking flicks as Erik the Conqueror (1961), The Last of the Vikings (1961), Attack of the Normans (1962), and my favorite, Knives of the Avenger (1966). If you dig the cult classics like Medusa vs Son of Hercules (amazing intro theme song) and Zarak (with hubba-hubba Anita Ekberg), then check them out.

Need some tunes for a great gambling game? Bet $20 smackers against your friend on a game of Crossbows and Catapults while playing a Les Vikings d'Haiti record. Root through the International section and perhaps with the help of Loki you will get lucky and find a copy.

Try to take more Vitamin V in your life. Vikings do your body good. I leave you now with my favorite song of "The Viking of 6th Avenue" -- "Bird's Lament" by the great jazz composer Moondog.

Relevant Tags

Kai Wada Roath (41), Vinyl (200), Jazz (152), Vikings (5), Moondog (3), Thor (4), Orson Wells (3), Tony Curtis (3), Ernest Borgnine (6), Kirk Douglas (1), Balboa Theatre (24), Las Vegas Grind (2), Anita Ekberg (2)