Amoeblog

Lizards of Ahs -- Happy Lizard Day!

Posted by Eric Brightwell, August 14, 2010 11:00am | Post a Comment
Lizard on a branch

Lizards are a large, diverse group of reptiles. Around 3800 species live on land and in sea, on every continent except Antarctica. They range in size from geckos and chameleons (as small as a few centimeters) to komodo dragons (nearly three meters). Their used to be mosasaurs, which reached 17 meters! They proved to be too large and dangerous for Noah and his crew and so, went extinct.

Mosasaur
The "once" mighty mosasaur

Although lizards give a lot of people the willies, most pose no threat. Gila Monsters and Beaded Lizards are poisonous but not likely to kill you, just give you a lot of pain. Komodo Dragons, on the other hand, are nothing to mess with. They sometimes stalk and attack humans and as recently as 2007, one killed an Indonesian kid. Nonetheless, in 2001, Sharon Stone's idiot husband bribed a zookeeper to let him see one up close and ended up in the hospital as a result. She divorced him three years later.

Komodo Dragon
Please don't feed the dragon -- your toe

Numerous less dangerous species of lizard are kept as pets. Their owners often walk around with them on their shoulders and are the types to have weird goatees and other features designed to hammer home their eccentricity. Don't be one of those people.

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Posted by Job O Brother, March 28, 2007 09:58am | Post a Comment

               INT. GREG'S OFFICE - DAY

               GREG, late 20's, sits in half-lotus position on his cluttered
               desk. He is wearing a button-up shirt and tie. His shoes are
               off.

               His eyes are closed. His thumbs and middle fingers, touching.
               He is meditating.

               We can hear the sounds of a bustling corporate world outside
               his office.

               Door opens. Enter LOUIS, pre-teen, overweight, nerdy. He is
               holding a cardboard drink carrier in which are four tall
               mochas. Balanced on top of this is a small paper bag.

               Louis closes the door behind him.

               Greg does not respond to Louis' entry; continues meditating.

               Louis stands still and watches Greg.

               Some time passes.