Amoeblog

(In which the author recounts another November, long ago...)

Posted by Job O Brother, November 15, 2010 07:52pm | Post a Comment

Happy Thanksgiving!

At age 17, while most of my friends were either studying at high school or studying how to get high at school, I spent leisurely days brainstorming new and creative ways of annoying our local Sheriff and his deputies.

Living in a tiny Gold Rush town tucked in the foothills of the Sierra Nevada Mountains – a quaint dot on the map named Nevada City, California – with a population of less than 3,000 people and a downtown district that could be circumnavigated in a brief jog, the only trouble a teenager could get into was trouble he made himself.



Nothing's changed. Except the colors are brighter now.

I had a partner in crime – the prettiest girl in town and my best friend, Autumn. We were soul-mates, mutual muses, and best of all, we were both enrolled in the independent studies program, which meant our actual campus time was reduced to a single 20 minute session a week, leaving the rest of our schedule open for adding to our collection of abandoned lawn ornaments, inventing new kinds of candy, and devising “experiments” to test the moods and reactions of our fellow man. Some people called us practical jokers, but we fancied ourselves social anthropologists.

It was late September and very hot. Autumn and I lounged in a swimming pool, which was conveniently located in the middle of her upstairs bedroom. In a moment of brilliance fueled by heat-stroke, we constructed the pool there so we could watch TV or toast bagels while we soaked. We drank water from margarita glasses, snacked on Joy-Pops (an unpleasant tasting but texturally exciting confection we assembled from parts of Almond Joys, Pop Rocks and wasabi), listened to polka music and played Trivial Pursuit.

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HAPPY EASTER!!!

Posted by Job O Brother, April 4, 2010 10:22am | Post a Comment
easter bunny
The screams of children are drown out by the wailing of their mothers.

Oh geez. I’ve been sitting here – literally for minutes! – trying to think of what to blog about; meditating on current events both in my life and on this wacky planet we call Bruggafaderöllfyrwabbanonie (though “we” are a chosen few and most people prefer the moniker “Earth”), and couldn’t come up with anything special about today. I finally thought to visit my friend Wikipedia for some thrills, chills and spills in the form of their random article feature, only to suddenly remember that today is [insert cuss word here] Easter.


It’s Easter, brother! How could I not notice?

I’ll tell you how: I have no kids in my life. No one excited that an anthropomorphized rabbit might be prowling in the night, leaving artificially-colored produce is sneaky spots around our property (how kids think this is “neat” is beyond me and perhaps bespeaks to an aggravated psychological wound in our collective consciousness). My youngest nephews are all in Northern California, safely out of reach from Melrose brunches and Angelyne billboards; the closest thing to a child in my life is the kitten we just rescued. (Her name is Maybe.)

Easter Promises - Every Sin Leaves a Mark

Posted by Eric Brightwell, April 12, 2009 03:24pm | Post a Comment
Hello friends, it's Easter once again. And no one does Easter better than Amoeba. Yes friends, Amoeba is known for our selection that simply can't be beat. So after gorging yourselves on low quality milk chocolate lupine effigies to honor a pagan fertility goddess, sit back in the easy chair and let those calories do their worst whilst you enjoy some of our fine Easter fare. Do your one "hop" shopping at Amoeba this Easter, won't you?




Thanks Easter Bunny!!!!!!!! *Bwok Bwok!*



Remember, Ēostre is the reason for the season.



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Happy Easter

Posted by Whitmore, April 12, 2009 10:00am | Post a Comment

Happy Easter!

Posted by Eric Brightwell, March 23, 2008 12:38pm | Post a Comment
In terms of beloved figures central to Christian children's mythology, the Easter Bunny would probably show up near the top, well below Santa Claus but higher than Jesus, The Sandman and the Tooth Fairy. Actually, I was never too crazy about the Tooth Fairy. What does she does with all those teeth? Why does she buy our silence with micropayments left under our pillows?

    

Questions about the Easter Bunny are less frightening and more practical. How does a rabbit lay eggs? Where does the Easter Bunny live the rest of the year? How does he carry the Easter basket? And perhaps, what does he have to do with Christ Jesus' resurrection (if you're Rod or Tod)?

Of course, like all great holy days, Easter's roots aren't in Christianity. Whereas usually the Churchies change the name of the holiday when moving their religious observance onto its pagan foundation, in this case they left the old name. This could be because Eostre, a goddess of the Angles and Saxons, hadn't been actively worshiped for some time when Jesus' resurrection was being celebrated.

      

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