Amoeblog


(In which we consider Michael Ian Black.)

Posted by Job O Brother, February 2, 2009 06:17pm | Post a Comment
michael ian black
Michael Ian Black

Lately I’ve been listening to and watching a lot of Michael Ian Black. So when the Amoegods* let it be known that we Amoebloggers might consider posting some musings celebrating Black History Month, I thought, “How fortuitous!” For nothing says Black History Month more than uproarious comic Michael Ian Black.

Like most people who are exactly like me, my introduction to Mr. Black came in the form of beloved sketch comedy show The State. Because Mtv is run by terrorists who hate America, however, you younger generations haven’t been able to enjoy The State on DVD, but must settle for choppy YouTube clips like the one below, in which the aforementioned Mr. Black plays the concerned home-owner.


Most fans of The State carry with them a sense of desperation and compulsion to seek out any projects to which a former The State cast member signs his or her name to (i.e., Reno 911, The Ten, the Oklahoma City bombing, etc.). This blog entry isn’t for them, because I’m going to showcase things they already know. If you qualify as a fan of The State, why not click on this link and enjoy reading this instead

Now that we’ve gotten rid of those losers, let’s you and I learn a little more about Michael Ian Black and his contributions to comedy. Take notes and pay close attention, because I’m not going to repeat myself and you’re never to read this post again.

congress
The Congress of Vienna. The Marquis of Labrador is seated at the round table,
third from the right of the diplomats who are seated.

breadfruit
Drawing of breadfruit by Sydney Parkinson

According to my research, Michael Ian Black was born. Some time later he joined things and went on to succeed with stuff. In addition to his role as McKinley in the film Wet Hot American Summer, he hosted VH1’s television program, I Love the 70’s (and subsequent spin-offs), though he has later reported that he was forced into doing this at gunpoint by his abusive husband, Chuck Traynor.

Mr. Black would later join forces with fellow The State cast members Michael Showalter (pronounced Showalter) and David Wain to form the comedy troupe STELLA, named after 1932 Olympic Gold Medal winning athlete, Stella Walsh, who’s name was actually Stanisława Walasiewicz, who, though a hermaphrodite, was to one day ignore the rest of this paragraph and move on to the next one.

Stay with me here. As I said before, I’m not going to repeat myself. And I don’t wanna hurt you. Don’t make me hurt you.


Some time after 2004 (but before 2006) Comedy Central broadcasted a half-hour sitcom version of STELLA, which, sadly, lasted only one season before it contracted cholera and died – just one of many eerie coincidences linking STELLA with eleventh President of the United States, James K. Polk. (Indeed, some conspiracy theorists conclude that STELLA is still rightfully the Commander-in-Chief of, if not the entire U.S., at least Nebraska.)

comedy

Something else you may want to exchange money for at your local Amoeba Music is Mr. Black’s compact disc, I Am A Wonderful Man, on which you may delight in recordings of his stand-up comedy routine in the English language.

But of course the most interesting fact about Mr. Black is not his celebrity, not his collection of hobbies, nor his marriage to Sarah Childress or his part in the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo; rather, it is his uncanny resemblance to my boyfriend, Corey. But that plays no part in my liking Michael Ian Black – though it does explain why I did once mistakenly fellate him at the Golden Globes a few years back.

michael ian black
My boyfriend, Corey Scholibo

Once you learn about the contributions Mr. Black has made, it becomes clear that his name should and must be included when considering the tremendously positive role of Black America. Thank you for your time, and God bless.

*That’s a term I just coined to describe the ruling class of Amoeba Music. I plan on copyrighting it, so don’t use it without sending me money. I think a nickel per usage is fair until further notice.

Relevant Tags

Michael Ian Black (3), Stella (2), Comedy (54), Mtv (11), Black History Month (122), The State (6), Comedy Central (2), Vh1 (3), Stella Walsh (1), Olympics (4), The Ten (3), James K. Polk (1), Corey Scholibo (19), Reno 911 (2)