Amoeblog

Dr. Seuss meets Philip K. Dick.

Posted by Whitmore, March 2, 2010 09:06pm | Post a Comment
Not only is March 2nd the 106th Birthday of Dr. Seuss but it is also the anniversary of the death of Philip K. Dick, who died in 1982. So why not combine the two? And that is what we have here below. Yes, this is a simple minded and profoundly idiotic, ill conceived attempt to combine almost every title written by a couple of the greatest writers of the 20th century, and why? I don't know. This is how I spend my days, blathering and dicking around, no wonder I get headaches ... anyway enjoy Dr. Seuss meets Philip K. Dick.
 
Gather yourselves together
Whether puttering about in a small land
Or playing hunches in bunches
With Yertle the Turtle and the Game-Players of Titan,
The eye in the sky playing Cat's Quizzer
And the Ganymede takeover shivers and cries,
While banging and clanging
The Vulcan's hammer is dangling, above
Daisy-Head Mayzie standing by.
Turning the wheel, Mary and the Giant,
No doubt slyly defiant,
Churns the broken bubble
Where the butter battle boils and toils into trouble.
The Seven Lady Godivas rides on beyond the Zebras
As for the man in the high castle,
He’s allergic and wheezes.
A streaking goat from the street speaks
“Do androids dream of electric sheep?”
And to think that I saw it all on Mulberry Street.
I hope I shall arrive here soon
To run a circus or a zoo
Say boo to the clans of the Alphane Moon 
Next door to Solla Sollew.
Oh, the places you'll go! And how! But will you please go now,
I know the crack in space lies beyond the Wub and that is how
The five hundred hats rub ol’Bartholomew Cubbins
In his stubby bathtub scrubbin’,
The eye of the Sibyl, liberal fun sizzles with a zap gun, stunning the sun,
And since the divine invasion has begun, I have but a question, just one.
Oh, say can you say wet pet, dry pet, your pet, my pet
The world Jones made is only a sublet
“But look how we got along after the bomb,”
he gets the tones of Jones, but once alone
“Flow my tears,” the Policeman said to the ducks in the pond,
“Say hey to the Lorax and Nick and the Glimmung,
And Bartholomew and the Oobleck.”
Tick tock never stops in a counter-clock world where the dark haired girl
Hops on Pop, and dances with the fox in socks on a little black box.
The Father-Thing sings, a great day for up!
And the cosmic puppets read with their eyes shut,
Did I ever tell you how lucky you are by the light of the stars?
I Can! You’re as variable as the Golden Man
Or Humpty Dumpty living in Oakland, with a folding fan,
Dining and wining on green eggs and ham, unteleport the man,
Or undo the minority report of Sam I am.
We can remember it, every bit of it
For you, Philip K. Dick and you Dr. Seuss
From wholesale robots, and androids with flutes
And Wockets in a pocket! And Grinch in Santa suits
Mechanical oddities and Dr. Futurity winning the solar lottery
Radio free Albemuth, valis, our friends from frolix, frolicking in the mix
 
The ABC’s of Dr. S and Mr. D
A is for A Scanner Darkly but only partly
B is for Birthdays to you and he, me and we
C is for a certain Cat in a hat, that’s a fact,
And D is for the Maze of Death, and quite a test,
A handful of darkness, oh what a mess, but you're only old once,
So let’s do lunch, bunches of lunches, munching,
Maybe even twice or thrice if you’re nice at night, okay!
Hey! We’ll throw a fishing pole into the cool,
of McElligot's Pool with Marvin K. Mooneys 
And Dr. Bloodmoney, who can moo, can you?
Here by the pool is where Horton heard a Who
We can wish for one fish, or two fish,
Lessons and confessions of a crap artist
How he pulled out a red fish, blue fish by the fist full,
And foolishly a ship full, filling a Martian time-slip and King's Stilts lists too,
Oh! The thinks you can think at will
Ubik and Sneetches and Thidwick, Big-Hearted Mooses
The thrill of the three stigmata of Palmer Eldritches
The man whose teeth were all exactly alike
He liked to ride bikes and race tikes on trikes
I can lick thirty tigers today he’d say
And why not, let’s yell hooray today for it's Diffendoofer’s Day.
Now wait for last year time out of joint, a rhyme about zoinks,
And a preserving machine’s mean and lean is moist and broke
Oh the short life of a bloke, Mister Brown he spoke
Who says he’s going down like a boat,
Oh well, what the hell, here’s to you and the days of Perky Pat
When he sat like a Cat in the Hat.
But wait on that, he and we will be back.

Happy Birthday Dr. Seuss!

Posted by Whitmore, March 2, 2009 01:25pm | Post a Comment

Gadzooks
Dr Seuss
Do you know what this morn brings?
For one thing on this day you were born,
So let’s sing
Ting a ling a song we’ll bring
So toot a flute
Go blow a horn
Let’s celebrate this great date in 1904.
Today sir
Is Monday for sure
Take a look
In my calendar book.
On page three you can see
The month to be is March I believe
And the day,
It says number two,
But not the number two like pooh,
Number two
Like a smooth loop into a curly cue.
The day between one and three,
A second before the third,
Two before four and three before five …
Just a try to solve
What’s enough and where's the stuff
And answer all the whys.
 
Anyway, let me say to you today good sir
Happy birthday in the grandest way
And to make sure of that
Here’s a party hat
A special one, elaborately done
That’s more than just wacky fun,
Designed and refined by critters you made
Who came alive on the page,
Books for kids age one to one hundred twenty three
With names that begin and end from A to Z
And stories even the man on the moon likes to read.
We’ll croon to you a zany tune,
We’ll sing to you a from a crazy balloon
Painted blue and red with yellow thread,
With a sunny bow that glows
Where ever it goes.
We’ll teach a baboon to cook a cake,
We’ll find a dancing prancing loon
To shimmy and shake.
 
Oh but Dr. Seuss let me sigh
It’s so sad and all too bad  
You’re not alive, still today
We will cheer loud and clear
Happy birthday, you're a hundred and five.
So take a look at all your books
and the words that shook us snooks
I still sneak a peak at least once a week,
Catching up with old friends of mine,
From time to time I take a seat
Kick up my feet,
Retreat into your boxes and foxes
And what a fish does
And how to talk to a Cat in the Hat
And a Zither Zather Zuzz.
I used to read to my son for fun,
And now he likes to read alone
On his own
Till the book is done,
It’s a funny twirling whirling
World you shared with us.
Thus and such from me and him
And a zillion,
Kajillion others too
Again and again from us to you
Thank you, Dr. Seuss
Thank you thank you
So very very much.