Magical Melodies, From Near and Far

Posted by The Bay Area Crew, November 3, 2016 05:16pm | Post a Comment

Magical Melodies, Golden Rake Records-- By Kai Wada Roath
Ambassador of Confusion Hill and host of the Super Shangri-La Show

As the story goes, when the young thief Abu awoke on a deserted beach and discovered a strange bottle washed upon the shore, he had no idea it would be holding a powerful djinn prisoner inside. The djinn, once released with a rub, would offer to grant Abu three wishes beyond his wildest wonders. Abu’s first wish, naturally, was for a plate of delicious, sizzling sausages. His second wish was for a quick lift on the djinn's shoulders to a sacred temple at the top of the highest mountain in the world where he would swipe a giant mystical jewel named the All-Seeing Eye. His third and final wish...a copy of the Magical Melodies 45, pressed on purple swirled colored vinyl (limited press of just 500)!

Much like the inscribed mystery stone of Oak Island, the Peralta Stones of the Superstition Mountains, and Drake’s Plate of Brass, if there was music that should be buried in a time capsule for alien archeologists to later unearth to be deciphered to represent our culture, this record would undoubtedly be it.

A remarkable compilation of four musicians from lands near and far, all the songs on this 45 were recorded acoustically, and they are as raw as the roast beef that my little toe likes to eat. For those who enjoy a little psychedelic voyage for their ears, the record was mastered together like a sorcerer’s soup by Greg Ashley of The Gris Gris and The Mirrors.

This first beautiful composition is from Squeezy, the strolling minstrel of the old pirate town of Charlotteville on the tropical isle of Tobago in the West Indies. Squeezy sings a song titled "Calypso Dildo," a tale of his fears and concerns about a forever-satisfying replacement that his girlfriend has brought back from a trip to Miami. Listen well and you can hear the lapping of the waves in the background, as it was recorded at the end of a small pier.

Next, Il Bacigalupo sings about his frustrations of "Chicken Toes." As the great Fats Waller sang about his disgust for big feet, Il Bacigalupo sings of crinkle toes with nails as sharp as Ginsu knives. And the surprise ending for all to enjoy…a bull’s eye splash! Some whispers on the Barbary Coast have been heard that Il Bacigalupo is non-other than mild-mannered Darin Raffaelli of the famed band Supercharger. Of course, to announce this to the world would be as shocking to society as exposing Clark Kent or Bruce Wayne’s secret identities. For the love of the mysterious dark arts and the super-heroes hiding among us, we shall keep this a secret forever...unless it helps sales, and if that's the case...he's Darin Raffaelli.

Christopher Santamaria
Christopher Santamaria

Christopher Santamaria, the charming Pisces of the East bay, sings "I'm Just a Little Bit High." This Los Angeles native has entertained the Bay Area with several musical groups, none of which you've ever heard of: The Party Ice Breakers, Salami & Garfield, Loli & The Chones, and, most recently, Midnite Snaxxx. When Christopher isn’t playing music, he is making art and enjoying pan-fried dumplings at Shandong in Oakland. Christopher's Chinese Zodiac is the Year of the Pig (compassionate, generous, modest, an entertainer) and he has a deep love of garlic and garlicky things.

Wildman Ronnie Roseman is a taxi driver, swamp ape hunter, and hollering maniac from Florida. (By the Gods of Olympus, I love this guy.) When he’s not almost getting kicked out of Bigfoot conferences, Ronnie will sing in the back seat of your car on the way to the Indian Casino. Ronnie is accompanied on guitar by the one and only Matty Ice (of the aforementioned world-famous Party Ice Breakers) on Ronnie's hit "The Witches on the Hill." (Supernatural bonus: this song was recorded in the haunted 7th Street Theater in Hoquiam, WA.)

Wildman Ronnie Roseman
Wildman Ronnie Roseman

All of these "fine" musicians have been put into this plastic pancake musical cornucopia by the magician and founder of Golden Rake Records, the Semi-Great Salmagundi. If you have ever gone to the Burger Boogaloo music festival in Oakland, then you have probably seen him (often accompanied with the Jolly Green Giant holding a "18 carat" gold rake) challenge bystanders to beat his mental powers and win a free record.

Look out for Golden Rake Records and Big Jolly at the Bay Area Record Fair (BARF) this Sunday, November 6th.

This flat, little round treasure, Magical Melodies, can also be found, of course, at your favorite Amoeba Music store!

Relevant Tags

Barf (5), Christopher Santamaria (1), Kai Wada Roath (38), Golden Rake Records (1), Greg Ashley (2), Squeezy (1), Il Bacigalupo (1), Darin Raffaelli (1), Supercharger (1), Wildman Ronnie Roseman (1), Midnite Snaxxx (3), Bay Area Record Fair (4), Burger Boogaloo (14)