Amoeblog


(For which we beg your forgiveness)

Posted by Job O Brother, April 6, 2009 03:12pm | Post a Comment
walker
I spend a lot of time walking; it’s my favorite mode of transportation, except for maybe riding a train, but riding a train from my apartment to, say, Amoeba Music Hollywood, would require either walking half the day to the train station, spending lots of money on a ticket to the next nearest destination which would be somewhere on the outskirts of Los Angeles, at which point I would either have to walk back, which would take a couple days (stopping for food/bathroom/weeping breaks) OR a couple hours in a cab (which would cost more money than I make in a week) OR require walking to a bus-stop and a day-long bus ride. I could do all that, or I could walk the 10 minutes from my apartment to Amoeba.

So, while technically riding a train is my favorite mode of transportation, context is of some consideration, and that results in walking sometimes being my favorite mode of transportation.

Please accept my apologies for the above two paragraphs; they were a complete waste of both our time.

While walking to various destinations, I often enjoy listening to books that have been recorded. People, myself included, still most often refer to these as “books on tape,” even though compact discs are the preferred vehicle for said recordings (“said recordings” – get it?).

I am really hating my journalistic “voice” in this article. Like, a lot. But, going on…
tape

Amoeba Music has a hearty supply of used, “books on tape” and other spoken-word gems. In the Hollywood branch, they’re located in the jazz room, tucked between the classical and experimental sections. We put them there because they kept getting picked-on by the rock/pop DVD’s and vintage posters, both sections known for their name-calling and general rowdiness.

At the time of this writing, there is only a vague organization of the section, and if you come into the store in a hurry – let’s say you’re in labour and your cervix is dialated about 3 centimeters – and you want a copy of Dianetics on CD, as read by Ruth Buzzy, you’re bound to be intimidated by the task of finding it. That’s the bad news. (Well, that and the discovery that you weren’t really pregnant at all – it was merely a splinter, not a fully gestated fetus, and now you have to return all those baby shower presents and cancel the placenta burying ceremony you had booked at Shakey’s Pizza who refuse to refund the deposit you paid even after you explain it to the manager who should have more compassion because she’s pregnant herself and shouldn’t be so quick to judge.)

THE GOOD NEWS IS that most every item in Amoeba’s “books on CD” section is inexpensive. I am constantly finding wonderful books to hear that are under five bucks. Five bucks! That’s less than a small pizza at Shakey’s!

(The above sales pitch may explain why Amoeba’s never hired me to work in the marketing department.)

Anyway, come check the section out, sometime when you’re not in a hurry.

In other news, The Advocate has published the article I wrote about my recent cruise to the Caribbean. You can read it by clicking on the picture below:


For those of you who didn’t click on the picture but instead continued on by reading this sentence, I apologize once again, as this sentence is only going to be another waste of your precious time, though of course by now it’s too late and you’ll never get the seconds lost back, which may not be a great tragedy in the scheme of things, but even so stands testament to the fact that fate is often unjustly impacted by silly fools who have nothing better to do than steal the attention of others in vain efforts, whatever they may be, and regardless of how these actions impact others.

Relevant Tags

Amoeba Music Hollywood (104), Books (16), Books On Tape (1), Books On Cd (1), Spoken Word (10), The Advocate (9), Pizza (4), Pakistan (5), Ruth Buzzy (1), Muppets (8), Muppet Show (2)