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Ganymede

Posted by Eric Brightwell, August 10, 2008 01:23pm | Post a Comment
Ganymede

Ganymede is the largest satellite in our solar system and probably more interesting than the planet Mercury. It orbits the largest planet in the system, Jupiter. Imagine taking a gander into the sky and seeing that red storm swirling above you like the eye of Sauron! Luckily for citizens of Ganymede, you can't get shrooms there, because that would pretty much guarantee a scary time.



Jupiter (left) and Ganymede (right) (case'n you didn't know)

200km below Ganymede's icy surface, a salty subsurface ocean exists*. It is the only moon in the solar system to possess a magnetosphere. Its atmosphere is primarily composed of oxygen in various states.

 
           
The handsomest man alive since the handsomest man expired               The handsomest moon

It was named after the Gods' cupbearer in the Greek religion. The position of divine cupbearer had previously been filled by the goddess of youth, Hebe, who was replaced following the abduction and installation of Ganymede at Zeus' insistence. 

map turkey troad phrygia

Where it all went down- in what's now Turkey

Ganymede was a Trojan prince and the most handsome guy alive in his day. One day he was tending sheep whilst vacationing in Phyrgia. There he caught Zeus' pederastic eye and the god sent a giant eagle to abduct the guy and bring him to Olympus. In Olympia, he was well-liked except, perhaps not surprisingly, by Zeus' wife Hera. His greatest contribution to we mortals was inventing mead, the delicious alcoholic honey brew which made Grendel go cuckoo for cocoa puffs in distant
Götaland.

      barely legal gay action in antiquity 
The abduction of Ganymede             Getting high off of his own supply         "If you want me to play tambourine, just ask"

Plato later theorized that the story of Ganymede was invented. He figured it was created by Cretans to explain their curiously widespread love for young lads among their Minoan elders.

Ganymede wasn't the only name considered when naming the Jovian moon. It beat out "The Jupiter of Jupiter" as well as the possibility of being named after one of the members of the Medici family in an historical instance of corporate sponsorship.


Members of the Medici family. Don't you just want to slap them?

For all of its mystery and wonder, few filmmakers have utilized Ganymede as a setting, whilst video games, television episodes and animes rather more often have. In fact, one of the only films having anything to do with Ganymede is Operation Ganymed, a made-for-tv movie from Germany which aired in the '70s.

 busty japanese girls typical of anime  

In the animes Space Battleship Yamato (Uchū Senkan Yamato) and Geneshaft (jīn shafuto) some of the action takes place on Ganymede. In Cowboy Bebop (Kaubōi Bibappu), Ganymede is fully aquaformed and is the home of 7 million humans (who live in floating colonies) in addition to new lifeforms unique to the world.

star trek convetions of scotty drunk

Eht's Grrrrane!

On Babylon 5, there is an ice mining operation is situated there. In the Star Trek episode "By Any Other Name," Scotty gets faded on some green drank he's picked up on the moon. "Ganymede" is the first word uttered in the series Red Dwarf.


                                        One Must Fall 2097                                                                       Carnage Heart


                             Target Earth                                                                                 Shadowgrounds

In the PC game One Must Fall: 2097, combatants fight for the right to develop Ganymede. It's also featured in the PC Game FOM, the Sega Genesis game Target Earth the Playstation game Carnage Heart, and the PC game Shadowgrounds.

*maybe


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